The On-going Terror of Power Rape

This is what I learned this week. It isn't so much that I don't want to be seen, it's that I don't want people to know me. Not revealing who I am will protect me from the horrors of terrorism.

How can anyone terrorize me if they don't know my fears? Terror may seem an extreme word for blackmail or extortion. But as the victim, I feel the kind of dread that terrorism invokes.

Those Lying I's

I don't know why I do this, but I almost always embellish stories. It just happens and when I rehash what happened I realize that I did it.

During my last session w/ ologist I was describing details of my power rape and in response to, "what did you do after that?" I said, "I told him to get the hell off of me." then later I said, "I told him to get the hell out of here." Neither was true. To tell the truth, I never said anything. I just lied there feeling ashamed of myself for letting him coerce me.

So why the lies? Something to discuss during my next session.